The Window Seat

This is for you!

The one that sits quiet & comfortable.

Staring across countryside, along roads torn & into eyes that spark uncertainty.

                                                     

                                                           Silently you observe with birds-eye view.

Through crowded streets & quiet souls.  By way of outstretched hands eager to feel your love for just a moment.

Desperation seeps through your own veins as if you are breathing her breath.  Feeling his loss.  Living within their concrete walls.

And at times, it’s almost too much to bear. 

The burden weighs so heavy. 

Hope covers them like a blanket.  And for some, is the only thing that will tonight.

We hold on to this moment.

The beauty of Doxology sung.  Did angels join in when they heard?

Did even our tears gain power in those moments to shake the gates of heaven?

Through joy in the meeting & sadness in the parting He keeps us on task for His work.  For we are the hands & feet.  Surrendering to the calling.

Just beyond the comfort zone He pulls us.

Beyond the walls that protect us.

Out of the window seat.

And into the presence of angels in the flesh.  To hold their hands.  Be enveloped by their hope. 

And yet WE are the ones that learn the most.  That experience Holy Spirit movement. 

And that’s where we find Him. 

Just beyond the edge.

He placed us here in ruin & rubble so our hearts break wide open to a need so great that we will never go back….to our own way of selfish living.

We move beyond the comfort in our own lives to dwell in the comfort of His arms. 

Seeking to understand the things that don’t make sense with human eyes. 

And like the ones that have nothing, seek Him with EVERYTHING that we do have!

Finally, opening our eyes to what is beyond the tinted glass & making what we see be from God’s majestic eyes & through His touch…..

EVERYTHING becomes beautiful.

He Never Turns Away

As a friend’s mom lies in a hospital bed, only alive at this point because a machine is keeping her that way, I wonder what to say to her. 

My young friend.   Who has seen more in her own life already than most. 

My young friend who relies on her own strength. 

Who can’t see Light right now because she hasn’t ever experienced It for herself.

Me, never really at a loss for words, not ashamed of my faith one bit, is finding it hard to come up with anything.  Anything that will make a difference to her heart. 

The mom, her mom, never really was a mom to her at all.  Rather more of a lesson in self-preservation.  Having to live hard life way to early.  Growing up in a home that wasn’t normal.  Filled with drug addiction & heartache.  With words that cut through a soul & abuse that is much easier suppressed in a place deep in the chasm of that self preservation.

How do I tell her in her questioning….that He never looks away.  Not EVER! 

He has always loved her mom.  He has felt her heartbreak.  He is watched with His own sadness, as choices have placed her in circumstances He never would have wished for this sweet daughter of His. 

He has waited for her. 

Called for her. 

Protected her. 

Loved her. 

Even as the machines breathe for her.  Even as brain function slows.  Even in the final moments until family makes the decision to let her go, He is there. 

I can’t answer so many questions she may have.  And she may not want me to.  We stand on different sides of the fence when it comes to Love.  With Soul-Matters.

The only thing I do know is that He never looks away.  He sees the drug addict searching for anything but Him to ease their pain.  He hears the prisoner crying out to Him, repenting of decisions, poor judgment, misuse of the life they were given.  Wanting so badly to change their fate.  He hears the call of the hungry & the oppressed.  He sees the children that are malnourished.  He watches as the child trafficking becomes a cultural epidemic in some parts of our world. 

We can look away.

 We can turn our eyes from the prostitute on the corner.  We can shield our eyes from the suffering.  We can walk away from life that doesn’t line up with our neatly wrapped package of suburban living. 

He doesn’t.  He sees.  He hears.  His eyes do not move away from anyone or anything.  From any circumstance.  His eyes are on the slums & the saintly.  He never leaves us. 

She struggles to find peace.  I struggle to find words.  I know my God!  The One that loves me.  The One that loves her.  The One that loves her mom.  He loves us in our sin.  And He loves us through it.  He loves us in spite of it.  Because He….Is….LOVE!  And ‘love never fails’!!  That’s His promise.  If He is Love & ‘love never fails’ then He can’t fail us!   He finds us where we are.  In our own failing. 

I don’t know how to make her see.  I want for her to feel peace & forgiveness.  For someone that prides herself on words, I’m sure not finding any that will provide for her right now.  None that would make sense to her anyway. 

I will pray.  Maybe those are really the only words I need to utter at this point. 

In(Dependence)

I’ve always considered myself independent.

 I don’t count on others to do things for me.  (My husband may disagree!)

But I walk my own path.  Don’t worry about what others think all that much.  I can manage just fine on my own.

Being independent these days, shows strength.  It means you don’t need people.  You can make a life for yourself with no favor from others.  Get by with little help.  Support yourself in whatever lifestyle you choose.

 

But being in dependence of God is something that I desire. 

I am dependent on Him for EVERYTHING. 

I look to Him to give me provision in every aspect of my life.

From finances to food on our table.

From the clothes on my back to the clean sheets on our bed.

I depend on Him for my health & safety. 

I look to Him to alter my heart when it’s not in a good place.

I rely on Him to move in my life every day so I can be a better mom, better wife, better friend, better person, better servant to Him.

Without Him, I can’t do anything…..nor, do I want to.

And this doesn’t make me weak. 

In fact, it does the exact opposite.

       I am stronger through Him.

               I stand because of Him. 

 And even when I rest on the shoulder of His forgiveness & mercy, it’s there that my dependence transforms into something that can move mountains.  It is there that the shadow of weakness turns to radiance that transcends this world we live in.  And my dependent heart becomes STRONG……..In….                                                          Compassion....Forgiveness....Empathy....Love.....Patience......Kindness....& Joy!

                                    

                                                                                                                                                                        

 I CAN’T manage this life on my own.  I’ve tried.  And I have failed.

I AM weak.  He gives me strength.

I AM broken.  He mends.

I NEED HIM.  I AM…….DEPENDENT.

FREE stuff

Who doesn’t love free stuff?

Especially when it’s TRULY priceless.

No money exchanged.

Nothing paid.

No debt.

No formal obligation.

No binding contract.

Just plain FREE!

Ours for the taking….all we have to do is RECEIVE it!

Webster’s defines FREE as something given or received without cost.

What price would you put on…..

Forgiveness…

Love….

Peace….

Grace….

Forever?

But, don’t be deceived.  A HIGH price was paid.  But it wasn’t by us.  We have it easy. Burdens were carried. Hands were scarred.  Sins were forgiven.  Blood was shed.  Our LIFE was (and IS) made in death.  Jesus paid the price.  He took care of our debt.  He knew that we couldn’t afford to pay if on our own.  And we obtain an inheritance in Him.

He took our binding contract of increasing sin & wiped our debt away   with every drop of blood shed that day on the cross.

Because of His generosity…..we are no longer imprisoned.  The shackles that confine us are broken & leave us with liberty….for an eternity with Him. 

And we have no financial obligation to Him.  He doesn’t expect us to ever pay Him back.  The ONLY thing He asks in return is for us to BELIEVE in Him.  That’s it.  A simple request really.  To worship Him….because He is & was & ALWAYS will be the same.  Yesterday, today & forever!

The old saying goes, ‘there’s nothing free in this world’.  And that’s true for everything except one thing.  God’s love for us. 

Even on our worst day.  He is still there. 

Even when we feel worthless…..He thinks we’re priceless!

And the only thing that needs to be exchanged is…..LOVE….between Him & us.  And I would pay just about anything for THAT!

Don’t we owe Him just that?  If nothing else.  Believe in the One that believes in us!

Spiritual Droughts

We had a drought a few summer’s ago. 

Water was being rationed.

Lakes & reservoirs were dried up.

Grass & trees were dying because there was nothing to sustain them.

Needing something.   Nothing coming.

The same thing happens to us when we are in a spiritual drought.

We don’t see God moving.

Our spirits dry up.  Become barren.

Not producing fruit.

What we give to others becomes rationed.  Stifling our souls when we need to readjust how much we are allowed to give.

Praying for rain.

Seeking water at every turn.

Searching for anything that will quench our thirst….

Replenish our spiritual crops so that we can once again, reap the reward of God’s provision.

We wonder why God would leave us.  Why He would allow for such a thirst to choke our throats so tightly that we are on our knees crawling to find the next drop of rain.

But God doesn’t leave us. 

         He is always there. 

              Always willing. 

                      Ever present. 

Sometimes He just is sitting quietly in the corner, holding the glass of water, as we search frantically for where we last set it down.  Waiting for us to come back to Him. 

And when we do.  THEN it happens.  The sky opens up.   The rain starts to fall.  Allowing the water to run freely again.  The well overflowing.  Saturating our souls.  Providing life.

Once again, drowning us in love & abundant blessing.


I have been there.  
In a spiritual drought.  
Absent from God.  
And the things that I thought would fill me, the things I thought would quench my thirst.....only left me feeling in need in something more.  
In those times, when I thought that He wasn't there, wasn't listening, wasn't loving me-
I became aware that it was really me that had wandered off.  I was the one that had allowed my relationship with Him to become barren.  He was there all along.  Patiently waiting for me to return to Him for what I really needed.


Have you ever experienced that kind of thirst for Him?