Tuesday, March 9, 2010

The Art of Imperfection

Perfection is something that I’ve always struggled with.
Not because I seek other’s approval but it’s more for myself.
I like my ducks in a row.
I like things in my life to be neat & tidy
I know, it almost makes ME laugh out loud too considering the perfect pandemonium that resides inside these four walls every day.

My hangers are the same color. 
Our clothes display themselves nicely in their color-coded format.
Our home is decorated so that throw pillows match lampshades & candles compliment  towels.
Envelopes have gone in the trash hundreds of times because my handwriting wasn’t perfect.
If I play sports, I need to be the best.  If I ski, I need to be the first one down the mountain. 

And if I know I can’t do something well, then I’ll just not participate. 

Not just with sports but with life.  No matter what, I want to do the very best that I can.  To live up to my own high expectation.  To make the best lasagna or bake the best apple pie.  To plan the greatest vacation or birthday party.  I like things to be done WELL.

So then in walks the disappointment.
The laundry piles up. 
I burn the brownies.
I had to stop & walk the last time I ran a half-marathon.
And reality whispers like a gentle thunder ‘you are not perfect followed by a billowing clash of the words ‘…..and you NEVER will be’.


The one thing that I do have in my life that is absolutely perfect is the love of Jesus Christ.  The one and only thing with no blemish.

He doesn’t make mistakes.
There are no flaws.
No apologies.
No regrets.
Everything that comes from Him is in His perfect way.  His perfect timing.  His perfect love.
He is exact & calculated.
He is without blemish or stain.
He does not look back.  He does not stagger or fall.
He loves my imperfect heart with His perfect grace & mercy.
He knows my sinful ways & wipes them away with His perfect forgiveness.
He sees my imperfect parenting and steers me down His perfect path of patience.

So I’m going to stop trying to be perfect anymore.  I’m going to do what I can with what He gives me.  And place my imperfect life in His holy hands.

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